The way we come into the world: respectful childbirth and its emotional and physical consequences

If conception is usually an act guided by love between two people, childbirth should also be a delicate process of affection between the mother and her childHowever, we all know that nowadays, the way we come into the world is so standardized and protocolized that the emotional bond is often severed, like that umbilical cord that doctors rush to cut as if they were ripping something out. something left over and that it has no use whatsoever.

In our space "Mothers Today" we want to celebrate with you the week of respected delivery, there where to reflect on the importance of praising the need to choose in what way we want to give birth. Now we know that Safety and having good professionals is essential when having our childrenbut we can't forget a fact that the WHO itself has been warning in recent years: many women are suffering disrespectful and offensive treatment in health centers during their deliveries. It is necessary to delve into this aspect, change practices and above all, be able to decide for ourselves the way we want to give birth. On this occasion, we want to explain the possible consequences that may exist in the way we arrive in the world.

The way we come into the world: the impact for the mother

Few things can be experienced with greater intensity and emotion than pregnancyIt's nine months of plans, dreams to nurture, clothes to buy, a room to prepare, a body and two hearts to care for through proper nutrition, exercise and, of course, a successful emotional connection that we try to establish every day with that baby we learn to love without yet knowing his face.

We could say without mistake that throughout that time we carried out a complex path where Above all, we seek to connect with that creature that has grown inside us.However, when the time comes to give birth, we often lose all control of the situation and put ourselves in the hands of experts, who will guarantee "that everything goes well," but who do not always respect our timing, wishes, and emotions.

What most women experience in hospitals is a mixture of technology, haste, and, all too often, humiliation and depersonalizationAll the emotional groundwork we had built up over nine months is abruptly shattered in the delivery room, without permission, when the process is experienced as a purely medical act and not as a vital and transcendent experience for mother and baby.

In this context, the respected delivery It does not mean giving up on safety, but quite the opposite: it involves combining the best scientific evidence with dignified, informed, warm and humane treatment of the woman and her child, avoiding unnecessary interventions and placing the mother at the center of the experience.

• Mothers are placed in the lithotomy position and routinely and generally subjected to episiotomies, premature rupture of membranes, shaving, enemas, and electronic fetal monitoring, even when There are not always clear medical indications for each of these maneuvers.

• If the doctor deems it necessary, synthetic oxytocin will be injected to accelerate labor, even though A woman's body physiology is designed to produce its own oxytocin and take the process at their own pace, as long as there is no real complication.

• In recent years we have also observed the large number of cesarean sections, which together with induction itself makes us wonder if women today are no longer capable of having a natural birth, when Many of these interventions could be avoided. following the recommendations of the WHO and scientific societies.

• Another aspect that many moms often complain about is the clear humiliation suffered during childbirth.. The fact of not being able to choose the position when giving birth (we cannot forget that «the foal» is the most comfortable way for professionals to work), or things as crazy as being shaved with the doors open, exposed Without intimacy in front of students in practices, undressed and sometimes oriented to cesarean section as the only option, it makes the emotional impact very intense.

All of this forms part of what is now called obstetric violence: violent or disrespectful medical practices during pregnancy, childbirth and postpartum that violate women's rights, question their decision-making capacity and generate short and long-term physical and psychological consequences.

Post-traumatic stress syndrome as a consequence of childbirth

From the page Birth Trauma Association From the United Kingdom, we have received numerous studies on the consequences of these traumatic births that many women suffer today, emphasizing that Childbirth can be experienced as a truly traumatic event. when the dignity and autonomy of the mother are not respected.

• Monique bydlowski She is a psychiatrist specializing in the psychological experience of motherhood and childbirth. So much so, that she coined the term "post-obstetric traumatic neurosis," as a consequence of a very evident reality that she began to see in the 60s, when she observed How many women developed symptoms of trauma after childbirths experienced as violent or depersonalized?.

• Childbirth is a moment of great vulnerability for a woman.At the brain level, there is a specific neurobiological and hormonal environment prepared to facilitate imprinting and the beginning of the bond with the baby. If this bond is disrupted, it can have multiple consequences. Postpartum stress is one of them, especially when a woman feels that her boundaries and decisions have not been respected.

• Anguish, the feeling of feeling humiliated, of not having control or the ability to decide in many cases, seeing how your baby is manipulated and taken from you almost instantly to put it, for example, in an incubator, it's something very dramatic on a psychological level. The memory of childbirth then becomes a wound which returns again and again in the form of flashbacks, nightmares, or avoidance of everything related to the hospital.

• Nor can we forget something important: The stress level can be so high that the cortisol in the blood will affect the quality of the milk during breastfeeding.making it difficult to start or making the mother feel even more insecure and guilty.

A disrespectful birth is also associated with increased risk of postpartum depressionTokophobia (intense fear of another pregnancy and childbirth) and post-traumatic stress disorder are among the factors that can affect women who have experienced pregnancy and childbirth, as recent studies and perinatal psychology associations have shown. When a woman feels she was not informed, that her decisions were ignored, or that she underwent procedures without her consent, she is much more likely to develop these emotional difficulties.

In this context, specialized psychological support in the postpartum period, validation of the mother's experience, and the possibility of Reconstructing the birth narrative with a sensitive professional These are key elements for emotional recovery.

What exactly is a respectful birth?

From associations such as Delivery is OursGroups of midwives and international organizations advocate for a model of respectful childbirth and dignified birth, in accordance with the latest scientific evidence, accompanied by qualified professionals and in a warm and friendly environment.

The respect they demand goes far beyond treating a woman in labor with kindness and courtesy. For these organizations, respect also means Respect for the body, for timing, for the woman's wishes, for her rights as a user of the healthcare system, and for the needs of the baby from the first minute of life.

There are usually four main types of respect in a humanized birth, all of which have direct consequences when they are fulfilled or violated:

1. Respect for the physiology of childbirth: do nothing that goes against it, avoid immobilization, respect the dilation rhythms as long as there is no risk and do not perform interventions such as episiotomies or cesarean sections without a real medical indication.
2. Respect for women's wishes and needs: allow her to move, eat and drink if she wishes, to be accompanied by whomever she chooses and to be able to decide on positions or resources to relieve pain.
3. Respect for women's rights As a user of the healthcare system: to guarantee clear, truthful and understandable information about what is happening, the possible options, their risks and benefits, and that I can freely give or refuse my consent.
4. Respect for the baby's rightsFacilitate immediate skin-to-skin contact, avoid unnecessary separations, support the start of breastfeeding, and do not perform procedures that interfere with it without a well-founded reason.

The safe and respectful childbirth that these organizations advocate for It's not a fixed type of place (It is not necessarily a home birth nor exclusively a hospital birth). It is a birth where the woman has been able to choose, feels safe, trusts her body and the team that accompanies her, and where the professional knows and respects the physiology of childbirth, as well as the risks of each intervention.

The key lies in the philosophy and mindset of the professional that focuses more on the individual than on the physical setting. A team with a humanized approach knows how to accompany, observe, and supervise, intervening only when necessary and keeping the woman informed at all times, making her the protagonist of her experience.

Childbirth should be an act of love, but… what if it isn't?

Michel Oden He is a French obstetrician known for his strong advocacy of natural childbirth.The artificiality of operating rooms and modern medical practices is breaking down the emotional bond that should be created between mother and child at birth. As he himself explains, if emotions and love are what drive us to bring people into this world, It is not understood why the act of being born can sometimes be so traumatic for the mother and especially for the child.

In a respectful birth, professionals understand that they have the main role the mother and the babyTheir mission is to accompany the woman, detect potential risks early, and intervene only when necessary. Conversely, when the process is over-medicalized or rushed, the woman's will is disregarded and decisions are imposed without her consent, and the emotional and physical consequences can be profound.

Let's now look at some of the consequences of not enjoying what is known as "a loving birth" and how small decisions can make important differences in health and bonding.

The umbilical cord and its role in a respectful birth

• As we mentioned at the beginning, a common practice is to almost instantly sever that physical bond with the mother, which, whether we like it or not, is a gift of nature that we should maintain for a few minutes. Delayed cord clamping It has been shown to be beneficial for the newborn in numerous studies.

• Inside of umbilical cord There are 40 milliliters of fluid in which stem cells, nutrients, and multiple substances beneficial for the child's future development accumulate.It is a health benefit that helps improve iron stores and reduce the risk of anemia in the first few months.

• Cutting it immediately puts the newborn's life at risk. The umbilical cord is like a "vaccine" that the mother offers her child to fight [the virus]. e.g., against diseases such as neonatal tetanus and other infections by promoting better circulatory and respiratory adaptation. Respecting these minutes is a simple measure with a great impact.

The first thousand minutes of your life can determine your existence

We don't say it, it tells us Nils bergman, a renowned pediatrician and neonatologist who speaks to us once again about the toxic stress of a "bad birth", a cold, standardized, dehumanized and sometimes even traumatic birth for the mother and child.

• The immediate separation between the child and his mother as soon as he is born can generate such a high level of stress that all of this can orchestrate subtle metabolic and cognitive changes in the child's own development tomorrow. Stress hormones increase and the baby's nervous system receives a threat message at a time when it needs calm and reassurance.
• Incubators can sometimes be places where we lose part of the bond with our children. We cannot forget that Few things can be as powerful as skin-to-skin contact between mother and child...as well as that first breastfeeding experience. When the clinical situation allows, prioritizing this contact is an investment in emotional and physical health.
• Our DNA expects that immediate union between mother and child, and if it does not happen, if that child interprets that the world "to which he has gone" is something hostile, cold and threatening, an emotional problem may arise tomorrow. . The baby's body is designed to soothe itself at its mother's breastListening to his heartbeat and his breathing, feeling his warmth.
• A birth carried out with love, with respect between mother and child, where they enjoy those 1.000 minutes together, Skin to skin initiates a wonderful neuronal attunement that will build and strengthen structures as powerful as the amygdala or our prefrontal cortex.: architects of emotional and social intelligence that will accompany us throughout our lives.

We have to take it into account. You can and should choose what type of delivery you want.

Psychological consequences of a disrespectful birth for mother and baby

When childbirth is not carried out respectfully, the repercussions are not limited to the moment of birth. The experience can leave a deep mark on the mother's mental health and on the bond with her child.even if the physical outcome of the delivery appears to have been correct.

A disrespectful birth is one in which the physiological process is not allowed to unfold naturally and the woman is deprived of her capacity to know, to decide, and to be emotionally supported. When this occurs, the mother may experience childbirth with great fear, anguish, and sufferingfeeling that she has become an object of intervention and not the protagonist of her own story.

Beyond the immediate discomfort, various psychological consequences can be triggered:

• Increased risk of postpartum depressionwith feelings of sadness, lack of energy, guilt, or inability to enjoy motherhood.
• Difficulties bonding with the babyespecially when the mother experiences childbirth as something imposed or violent and feels that she has been robbed of the opportunity to begin the relationship on her own terms.
• Tocophobia, or intense fear of a new pregnancy and childbirth.which can lead to avoiding future pregnancies or demanding scheduled cesarean sections out of fear, even when they are not medically necessary.
• Post-traumatic stress disorderwith intrusive memories, nightmares, hypervigilance, avoidance of anything reminiscent of childbirth, and a constant feeling of threat.

Furthermore, the mother is likely to receive insufficient support during the postpartum period, and her environment may minimize the negative aspects of her experience with phrases like, "The important thing is that the baby is okay." This invalidation can lead many women to silence their pain and delay seeking help, feeling that They have no right to complain.

In infants, alterations in the mother-child bond can lead to early difficulties in emotional regulationIrritability, excessive crying, and feeding or sleeping problems may occur. In the longer term, an increased risk of cognitive, social, and emotional developmental problems has been described when the early relationship is severely damaged.

Therefore, promoting respectful and humanized childbirth is not just a matter of convenience, but a mental and relational health prevention strategy for the entire family.

Respectful childbirth: how it is put into practice

The theory sounds great, but many expectant mothers wonder how the idea of ​​respectful childbirth translates into reality. There are a number of principles and concrete measures that help make birth a safe, supported experience, tailored to each woman's needs.

Some of the practical keys are:

• Respect the physiology of childbirth, its timing and requirementsWhenever possible, inductions without indication, the use of unnecessary synthetic hormones, routine cesarean sections and episiotomies will be avoided, as well as the obligation to remain lying in bed when the body asks to move.
• Provide clear and reliable information to the mother at all timesYou need to know what's happening, why an intervention is being proposed, what alternatives exist, and the pros and cons of each. Informed consent is a right, not a favor.
• To welcome and support women's emotionsTheir fears, their tiredness, their pain, or their anger should be heard and validated, never ridiculed or silenced with derogatory comments.
• Allow the woman to eat or drink if she wishes, to change position when she needs to, and that she is accompanied by whomever she choosesprovided that this does not compromise clinical safety.
• Respect the right of mother and child to be together after birthfacilitating skin-to-skin contact and the start of breastfeeding without interference, except when there is a medical situation that prevents it.

When these requirements are met, the woman in labor is more likely to experience childbirth with less anxiety, with greater confidence in their body and in the professionals who support her. She will feel respected, listened to, and welcomed in a process that has enormous potential for psychological impact.

In this way, the birth experience will be much more pleasant and the postpartum period more positive. The woman will feel more connected to her baby and better able to cope with breastfeeding and parenting, significantly reducing the likelihood of triggering psychological disorders associated with birth.

Without explicitly naming it, the message is clear: how we come into the world and how we give birth matters—a great deal. The right combination of medical safety, accurate information, respectful support, and intimate contact between mother and baby can transform birth into an experience of strength, love, and empowerment that positively marks the beginning of family life.