If you want to be a great father or a great mother capable of raising a happy, healthy and well-educated child, in a house where authoritarian discipline is unnecessary… Then you will only have to create a much closer connection with your children. It is not enough that you tell your children that you love them and that you love them every day. Your love also has to be in your daily actions so that your children feel a good emotional connection.
Parents need to make emotional connection with their children the highest priority. That love is in your actions means paying close attention to what happens between us, seeing things from the point of view of our son, and always remembering that this child who can sometimes stress us is still that precious baby that we both hoped to embrace. .
It takes a lot of effort to fully care for another human being, but when we are truly present in children's lives, we often find that it energizes us and makes us feel more alive and connected to them. Being around another human being takes work and a lot of effort. But 90% of people on their deathbed say their biggest regret is that they didn't get close enough to the most important people in their lives. All parents who have older children would also like to go back in time and spend more time with their children… But the problem is that time does not go back, it always goes forward.
Being present is as easy as paying attention. Like a marriage or a friendship, your relationship with your child needs positive attention to thrive. Attention equals love. Like a garden, if you take care of it, it flourishes. And, of course, that kind of attention takes time.
How to build a great relationship with your kids
Build an intimate connection
The closeness of the parent-child connection throughout life is the result of how much parents connect with their babies, right from the start. Parents who are devoted to their newborn babies will have a closer relationship at every stage, also when they are teenagers and even as adults. If a man or a woman bonds with their newborn, they will remain close to him emotionally for a lifetime. But this bond must not only be created when the baby is newborn, it is crucial to do it on a daily basis at each stage.
A good relationship takes time and dedication
Good parent-child connections don't come out of nowhere, and neither do good marriages. Biology gives us an advantage, if we were not biologically programmed to love our children, the human race would have long since disappeared. But as children grow we need to build on that natural bond. Although the challenges of modern life can erode it, children automatically love their parents. As long as the parents work to have a good connection with them.
Prioritize time with your child
In order to be successful professionally, you dedicate many hours to your work, right? You should also spend a significant amount of time building a good relationship with your child. Quality time may seem like a myth, because there is no switch to turn on parent-child closeness. Imagine that you work all the time and have booked a night with your partner, whom you have hardly seen in the last six months ... Do you immediately start to 'undress' his soul? Surely not, you will need time to connect emotionally.
In relationships, without quantity there is no quality. You cannot expect a good relationship with your children if you do not spend as much time as possible with them and prioritize being at work or with your friends. Although life takes time away from us every day, it is necessary to prioritize time with children over anything else in order to build a good relationship with them.
Trust is essential
Confidence with children begins in infancy, when your baby learns if he can trust you every time he needs you. When a child is one year old, it is possible to know whether or not they are united with their parents, that is, whether or not the child trusts that their parents will be able to satisfy their physical and emotional needs. Over time, the trust of children is gained in other ways: playing with them when we tell them we do, picking them up on time from school, etc.
As parents we rely on the power of human development to help our child grow, learn, and mature. We trust that although our child can act like a child today, he or she will always be on the path to becoming a mature person. trusting that there will always be positive change. But that change will only depend on the trust and emotional bond that you establish with the parents.
Confidence does not mean blindly believing what your children say, no matter how old they are. Trust means not giving up on your child, not labeling him ... No matter what he does or what he says. Trust means that you will never leave him because you trust that he needs you and you will be by his side to solve things together with your son, but not to solve his life. You will give him the necessary strategies so that he learns to handle himself in life.
Respect has to be mutual
Many parents think that they should be authoritarian bosses with their children, but they are not. You can set limits and you should, but always being respectful towards your children and expecting the same respect from them. Respect does not mean that they are afraid of you, but that they know that you can set rules and limits by respecting their feelings and them as people.
For you to have a good relationship with your children, do not follow these tips and remember that it means to work on the relationship, trust and love every day. It is not something that you should work from time to time or when you think you have free time ... The relationship with your children should be your priority over anything else.