It seems that something as natural as breastfeeding is subject to the conditions that the society to which one belongs imposes, because breastfeeding, even though it is natural, is influenced by cultural norms, beliefs and expectationsFor example, when we talk about a nursing mother in Africa breastfeeding her 3-year-old son, nothing happens, and everyone understands because she has no other food to offer her child. However, when a cosmopolitan mother is well off financially, we are alarmed when we see a woman breastfeeding her 3-month-old or 3-year-old son on the street. Why does this happen?
First I want to start from the base that the breastfeeding is a mother's choice and that this cannot and should not be touched. But there are those who try to discover whether breastfeeding at these ages helps or not to foster a secure connection between mother and child. Something I have to say, without doing any research, is that I don't know of any child who, due to prolonged breastfeeding and adequate emotional education at home, has suffered any kind of emotional dependency or anything similar from having been breastfed until the mother saw fit, since what really matters is the education and emotional intelligence that is imparted at home. from respect and secure attachment, From my point of view.
Breastfeeding helps improve bonding and feeling of security that a mother can transmit to a child, since when it is a baby, it depends exclusively on its mother and father, but in the case of breastfeeding, more on the mother.
But I also have to point out that if you cannot breastfeed your child for whatever reason, you don't have to feel remorse or guilt Therefore, since it is a very personal choice, sometimes breastfeeding must be dispensed with against the mother's wishes. It is also worth mentioning that the feeling of security can also be transmitted to the baby through other displays of affection and love, such as cuddling and warmth from both the mother and the father. In both cases, the goal is to transmit security to the baby and for him to feel safe. develop a well-organized mental structure, and should always be supported with proper education based on respect and affection.
This topic is not exempt from dispute, and for that reason, I invite you to give us your opinion on the matter. All opinions are equally valid!
Breastfeeding psychology: much more than food
Breastfeeding is a relational and neurohormonal experience: in addition to nourishing, it activates circuits of oxytocin and prolactin that promote calm, sensitivity, and caring behaviors. Babies also "suckle" the context: doing so in a safe home is not the same as doing so in a stressful situation; therefore, the environment and support matter.
The psychology of breastfeeding includes beliefs, personal history and traces of how we were cared forPrevious references, the relationship with one's own body, and cultural messages shape decisions and experiences. There are no "robotic" choices: Each breastfeeding is unique and it depends on multiple factors.
An ecosystemic look at perinatal health
Maternal mental health is best understood with a vision ecosystemic: : the mother-baby microsystem is added couple and family, health services, work and culture. During pregnancy, childbirth and postpartum, they are common ambivalent emotions, tiredness and lack of sleep. They may appear blues (brief sadness), postpartum anxiety or depression; in rare cases, puerperal psychosis. Detect, accompany and destigmatize it's key.
When breastfeeding hurts or becomes complicated, increases the risk of emotional distress. On the contrary, when it flows, many mothers feel empowered, protected by oxytocin and with a better bond. Whatever the type of diet, the important thing is to maintain skin to skin contact, look, caresses and sensitive response.
Main psychological benefits
- For the baby: it enhances the secure attachmentThere immediate comfort and a sense of continuity after birth; various studies link breastfeeding with better self-regulation and socio-emotional development.
- For the mother: Most self-efficacy, reduction of Stress, lower risk of postpartum depression when the experience is satisfactory and improves linkIn women with a history of body image difficulties, breastfeeding may help reconcile with one's own body.
Common difficulties and how to address them
At the beginning they may appear improper grip, cracks or mastitis. As well low milk transfer by technique, ineffective suction due to frenulum, prematurity or immature coordination. Advanced maternal age in the first pregnancy can be a risk factor added. All of this is aggravated with loneliness, guilt, perfectionism or lack of support.
A good approach includes individual assessment (mother and baby), posture and grip check, pain management, plan to increase production if appropriate and education on demand feeding, mixed breastfeeding or respectful weaning. IBCLC consultants and specialized teams also offer emotional support and resources (groups, materials, follow-up).
also influence difficult deliveries, early separations, use of antibiotics and aesthetic or cultural pressures that devalue breastfeeding. Talking about royal maternities and deromanticizing expectations reduces the impact of guilt.
Artificial and mixed breastfeeding: preserving the bond
If you give mixed or artificial breastfeeding, you can maintain the relational warmth: skin to skin, looking into the eyes, to hold in arms, talk and respond to baby's cues. The goal is that the only thing that is lost is the breastmilk, not the interaction that promotes healthy development. A cared for and listened to mother She is the best mother for her baby.
Prolonged breastfeeding: evidence and myths
The main pediatric associations recommend the exclusive breastfeeding the first months and continue with complementary feeding for as long as mother and son wish, without setting an upper limit. The available literature does not confirm physical or psychological risks to keep it beyond 2-3 years; in fact, the prolonged lactation can be associated with greater security and better social skills.
There is no solid evidence linking breastfeeding with caries; the clearest risk factors are added sugars in baby bottles or pacifiers. Regarding environmental pollutants, comparative analyses indicate that balance of benefits of human milk remains favorable.
The biggest obstacle remains the social or professional rejection due to prejudice. Therefore, if a family decides to continue, the duty of professionals is support and offer tools to overcome difficulties, individualizing in special cases (such as high-risk pregnancy).
Practical keys to support and self-care
- Detects signals of emotional discomfort and ask for help: anxiety, persistent sadness, intrusive thoughts or anhedonia require empathic listening and, if appropriate, referral.
- Networks and resources: breastfeeding and parenting groups, milk banks, relactation after admissions or separations, and in-person or remote follow-up.
- Work and conciliation: plans extractions, conservation and support in the work environment to support your decision.
- Communicate limits and expectations to your environment to reduce pressures and sustain your food project.
Whether you share your breast or not, the goal is the same: bond, security and well-beingWe'd love to read your experience and your respectful perspective on this sensitive topic for so many families.
