The puerperium, better known as quarantine, is a very delicate stage in the motherhood process. Especially if we are first timers. It is a stage of discoveries and novelties, which will have very stressful and precious moments in equal measure.
Regardless of how the pregnancy or delivery went, the mother needs a period of physical and emotional recovery. It is then that the father plays a fundamental role at home, with the baby and with the mother. Ideally, they should take their role as the support you need for that recovery.
Postpartum
Despite that feeling of happiness that invades you every time you see your son, the physical reality is that you are tired and need to recover. Childbirth, whatever type of delivery it is, is a complicated and painful job.
If it is a vaginal delivery, it will have taken a lot of effort to push your baby. You may even have some stitches that will need to heal.
If it is a cesarean section, all the more reason you will have to rest, since you have just undergone a surgical operation. Although it is recommended that you get up and walk as soon as possible, you should not make efforts in a much longer period of time than if it is a vaginal delivery. It will be even more than quarantine, the stitches will remain fresh inside for months after delivery and should be taken care of as much as possible.
As you see, Regardless of the type of delivery you have, you are going to need Dad. You can't handle everything on your own and you should focus on taking care of yourself and your baby.
The father's mission
The most important thing to take care of is the baby and yourself. You must get used to your baby, learn when he cries from hunger, cold or sleep. It is a very hard task, in which you also have to take care of yourself.
Dad's mission will be to make sure this is possible. Prepare food, take care of the house, change the baby or take care of him while you take a shower. It is essential and essential that you count on their help, to the extent possible, because there will be times when you will find yourself having to even go to the bathroom with your baby, and you will feel that everything is too big for you. That is when the father must take action, even if only to give a word of encouragement, a "calm, you are doing well."
Attend to visits
That will be another important task that the father will have to take care of. In addition, you will have to capture the moment when the mother feels uncomfortable with the visits and politely dismiss them.. It is perfectly normal that in this situation both of you feel a desire for intimacy with your baby, which is not always understood by the rest of the family or friends.
There will be comments about what you should or should not do that can even provoke discussions. It is the father's job to mediate and make family and friends understand that he is your baby. You, and only you, will decide what is the most recommended for your child, under the recommendations of your pediatrician.
Attention to the partner and the child
As we have already said, that is the main mission of the father at this stage, since the mother will not be in the optimal conditions to do it for a while.
This care will not only serve to cover the basic needs present at that time. It will be essential to reinforce existing bonds with the couple and create new bonds with your child. This is because it is in the first moments of the child's life when the attachment bonds are strengthened.
Until today, has always been considered the main attachment figure to the mother, since she is the one who has always assumed the role of caring for the child almost exclusively. For these roles to change, it is essential that the father also take care of the son in this period.