Slow parenting, slow parenting

You may never have heard of the term Slow parenting, however, we are sure that many of our readers apply it every day in raising their children. This movement does not have its roots in any manual or study of psychopedagogy, nor in any guru of child psychiatry.

As curious as it may seem, Slow-parenting is actually a social movement that promotes the need to "slow down the current pace of society". They were looking for an expression opposed to "fast-food" to that fast food that, in essence, has so many negative consequences for health. Somehow, and when it comes to the education of the little ones, it seems that we are following the same patterns: speed up to raise stressed and consequently unhappy children. We invite you to reflect on this in «Mothers Today».

Slow parenting or the praise of slowness

The world goes by at an unstoppable speed: society itself and even ourselves demand a lot from ourselves in our own desire to improve. It is possible that all this will lead us to triumph on many occasions, but in reality, happiness does not always seem to go hand in hand with these concepts.

Today, there are many experts, educators and of course, the parents themselvesWho They try to empower children with their abilities beyond the excessive: English, music, ballet classes are assigned to them, we want them to be skillful, brilliant and that tomorrow they will achieve everything we have in mind.

However, these are the consequences that we are seeing in our day to day:

• Modern aging is carried out under a requirement that presents a high duality: we demand a lot from children, yet we become more protective and we do not leave, e.g., that they go to school alone until they reach adolescence.
• A high demand is made that does not go hand in hand with the teaching of responsibility,  the ability to choose, to be able to make mistakes as part of the learning process itself.
• We rush our children to get dressed faster, to finish playing early because they have to take them to extracurricular activities. Today's kids keep adult schedules. Now, we know that in many cases the responsibility to "speed up" the little ones is not only ours, also the society itself and the educational articulation imposes this explicit pressure.

The praise of slowness or Slow-parenting seeks to raise awareness among mothers, fathers, educators and institutions of the need to return to that slow parenting where balance prevails, respect and above all, favoring the child's own rhythm to grow and discover the world.

Slow-parenting does not mean slowing down the child's growth but respecting their rhythms

Slow-parenting does not mean that we put aside stimulation or interaction with our children to help them grow, to mature. It is simply a matter of "no pressure" and prioritizing quality over quantity.

"Slow" means understanding the maturing of our child, and not pulling him more than necessary to cause stress or anxiety.

•  Slow-parenting encompasses ideas such as knowing how to deploy meaningful parenting, in which "we must be present", enjoying the here and now in every aspect of our children's lives, but at the same time knowing how to respect their personal freedom: so much to grow , like to make their decisions when the time is right.
• Childhood should not be a race against time. Being a child means being able to play, being able to attend to stimuli, having time to enjoy, laugh and explore the world on your own terms.
• Something that we must bear in mind is that Slow-parenting starts first from the home itself. We need time, and to be able to enjoy a schedule with which to spend time with our children, rest with them, play with them and reflect with them.
• We know that today time is a privilege, that working hours are not always able to reconcile as much as we would like with family life. Hence, an adequate awareness of social institutions is also needed.

We become obsessed with giving our children the best, while we are "not there"

This idea is as complex as it is real: many parents become obsessed with giving them the best school, the best clothes, a room full of toys while they spend much of their time away from home for their work responsibilities.

We know that this is how life is established today, but it would be necessary to reflect on it to become aware of some aspects:

• Consumer culture has reached a kind of apotheosis where many people live only from expectations, of the need to offer the best to their children: perfect teeth with their braces, perfect hair, taking care that they do not gain overweight, giving them a perfect camping vacation ... Now, sometimes, none of this offers real happiness to the boy.
• Los expertos nos dicen que en los últimos años la maternidad se da ya en edades que rozan o sobrepasan los 40. Las madres han pasado mucho tiempo «soñando» cómo debe ser la vida de su hijo, ansiando darles sin duda lo mejor. Tienen unas expectativas muy altas.
• The key is simpler than we think, it is enough to trust, to let ourselves go, to understand that the best gift we can give our children is called "time", "Understanding," and "love." They do not need to speak 5 languages, earn honors, or be skilled in sports.

Our children will be what they want, and until they get it they should only have one goal: to grow in health and happiness.

Education in times of crisis

We could raise the interesting question of whether the current social and economic crisis is reflected in current parenting styles:

• Some families do see the need to demand and "accelerate" the pace of their children so that they are more competitive, so that somehow, they can have more opportunities tomorrow if they are well prepared.
• On the other hand, many mothers and fathers feel the need to reorient their values: to give importance to what is essential, to the basics: letting children enjoy their childhood slowly, of those moments of happiness that will accompany them tomorrow when they are adults.

Slow parenting does not tell us that we should go at a snail's pace in life, but rather allow us to explore, attend, breathe, enjoy our environment hand in hand with our children to value what really matters, without artifice or pressure.

We invite you to reflect on these ideas and apply them on a daily basis, not only in the education of your children, but in your own life: sometimes "slowing down" allows us to discover many of those wonderful things that surround us and that sometimes, due to the rush, we do not take into account.