Not all parents realize that they have children with strong willpower, in fact, it is the circumstances of life that tell you, and only if you are attentive to them. Usually children with strong willpower tend to be self-motivated by the things that motivate them innately.
If you do not know that your child has a strong will power or you think that it does not… Then, from now on you can help him to have an implacable will power. Do not miss the following tips to get your child to develop strong emotionally and with a willpower, enviable!
Do not be their enemy
Don't become the enemy by doing it your way. Being a dictator as a parent will only alienate your child from you and make you their enemy. Some parents want their strong-willed child to listen and obey above all else, so they become forcefully strict in their upbringing. They think that they must act in a dominant and energetic way to get their child's obedience ... and that this will help them to have unrelenting willpower, but in reality, this will only make you incapable and submissive, emotionally dependent.
Democratic parenting vs. authoritarian
Parents should try to be democratic parents to their strong-willed child. Authoritarian parenting methods should be avoided, as this type of parenting is a dictatorship with parents trying to exercise their will over their children. Authoritarian parenting is not especially helpful with strong-willed children. Conversely, democratic parenting methods are very effective with strong-willed children. Parents who use democratic methods have clear rules, are loving, consistent, and also value the interests of their children.
At the end of the day, your goal is to do what is best for your children. The rules for one child are not the same for another within the same democratic home. Each child is seen as a different individual with established rules but without an “all or nothing”, there is flexibility. They are able to listen to their children and determine the course of action in each specific case.
The rules are not just to be followed without question. Rather, the authoritarian parent views the rules as guidelines for the ultimate goal of raising healthy, happy, and emotionally stable individuals. Viewing the rules as guidelines provides some flexibility in parenting and children feel that they are heard. Quite the opposite of authoritarian parenting, where children don't feel respected at all.
Your children need to learn to make decisions
For a child to learn to make decisions, it is important that parents offer them options. The parenting methods of love and logic can work quite well with strong-willed children. This parenting method emphasizes offering options to children.
The way it works is that even from the very young, the child will be offered two options for most daily decisions. This allows strong-willed children to make decisions for themselves. Strong-willed children want to feel in control of their decisions and will. Allowing decisions throughout the day, even at the most basic level, puts decision making in the hands of the child.
This is obviously within reason. Parents provide the options, so they should be options that are beneficial to the situation. You must be clear about the options and that both are acceptable to you. What if you went to a restaurant every day and there was only one option and you couldn't choose? That could make you feel like you're in that restaurant's jail day after day.
Your child's home environment may feel the same as them. Are they told what to do throughout the day or are they allowed to make decisions about what they want during the day? With this two-way decision making, you are helping your strong child not only feel empowered, It is also helping you develop a positive relationship with them.
You don't want your child to feel like they are being raised in prison, so allow them to make decisions on a daily basis. You will have a better relationship with your child when you allow them to make these daily decisions because you are sending the message that their thoughts and opinions are important.
Don't force your own views
Strong-willed children become determined adults. If you want your children to have good morals and character as adults, then you need to help them lead by example. You can't force a strong-willed child to believe what you believe ... although you shouldn't do this in general, either. However, It is very important that your example makes a difference in their thoughts.
You are the number one role model and role as a parent. Your morals conform at home. If you want your child to have good morals, then practice what you preach. If you talk about not cheating and stealing and then your child overhears you at the dinner table talking about how to evade your taxes, then you are not setting a good example. Teach your strong-willed child to live a virtuous life by how you act and not just by what you say. Be the example you want them to follow in their lives.
It is important to have conversations with children about morals and character. Talking about this will help you determine the type of person you want to become. Allow them to digest the important role that morals and good character play in your future. This will help shape their behavior because you are shaping their mind.
From now on, you will realize that as the days go by, your children are beginning to build a personality with a relentless willpower! Something very important for your present and future life.