Love is one of the most important values that we can leave to our children. Feeling love and showing it by being affectionate is something that will determine the way they have in the future to relate in love. Our way of showing love will determine how they learn to show it too. Let's see how to promote the value of love in children.
Promote in values
We have already seen on other occasions other values that are also very important to promote children at home. As the gratitude value, the value of forgiveness, the value of friendship y the one with responsibility among others.
In school they learn knowledge, but at home is where values are taught and tools for life. The future happiness of your children and their mental health will depend on this, so it is very important to know what values we want to transmit to our children.
Love at home
Children need demonstrations of love to feel loved. It is not enough to meet your basic needs. They need long hugs, talks with their parents, games, laughs, movies, confessions and secrets. Moments of union that make them feel complicit, part of the family, loved, safe and valued. How we love our children and how we show it to them will affect their self-esteem and future relationships.. This is why this value is so important.
In the home There should be no lack of kisses, hugs and I love you. That it is not difficult or difficult to express love, that it be seen as something natural, good and rewarding. Let not words of love get caught in our throats out of shame.
The emotional wounds from feeling unloved (it does not mean that they have not loved us, but that we have felt it that way) creates needs and lacks that adults try to fill with other wrong things. A happy and loved child will grow up without any emotional deficiencies.
How to promote the value of love in children
- Apply by example. Review your way of showing love, how you relate to your partner and your child. How love sees through you. Your children need to feel your unconditional love although you already know it. Love is felt with the 5 senses.
- You never negotiate with love. Sometimes parents to get children to behave as we want we tell them "As you misbehave, I don't love you." So we are sending the message that depending on how he behaves or how he is, we will love him or not. We are not sending you a message of unconditional love but of conditional love. You have to teach them that actions have consequences but never your love and affection.
- Use your words carefully. Avoid judging and speaking ill of others. It is the opposite of educating with love, since love should not only stay within the walls of the home. Love must also be expressed towards others by not judging, making value judgments or speaking badly. Be understanding, empathetic, friendly, and tolerant.
- Share quality time with your children. In these times where we are always in a hurry and without time, we must make quality time for our children. They don't want more toys and things they just want to spend time with their parents. That time will not return and cannot be recovered.
- Give emotional gifts. You don't have to spend money to make a gift full of love like a letter, a photo, a drawing ... objects that nurture the bond of love in the family.
- Hug your children. It doesn't matter if you were raised in a family where physical contact was absent. You can start a new beginning in your family with verbal and physical demonstrations of love. It may cost you at first but what you will win will be immense.
- Boosts their good self-esteem. As we saw before, the love we show our children will influence their self-esteem. To promote good self-esteem should feel safe and loved, and that he knows how to distinguish and express his emotions correctly.
Because remember… values are not learned at school but at home.