Taking advantage of the fact that tomorrow is International Women's Day, I would like to talk to you about an important issue in society, for all people and for any family, and that is that we should not overlook: the role of women in our society and how it relates to the shared responsibility in the family and societyUntil not many decades ago, women were still confined to a patriarchal world where they were led to believe that their role was to raise children and be grateful for their husbands' efforts in bringing money home.
Perhaps the term "cruel" is too exaggerated for some people, and they will shield themselves by saying and defending the idea that many of those women were happy to lead that kind of life, and without entering into that discussion, one can only nod and say that it is true. But there were also many women who resigned themselves to sacrificing their dreams. for living the lifestyle that society imposed on them, whether they liked it or not.
Fortunately, all that is changing, and although remnants of that outdated society still remain, women have fought hard to achieve the lives they enjoy today. Yes, perhaps it is More work for women who, in addition to being housewives, work outside the homeThey have to raise their children and also enjoy life. But it is possible, and many of us love doing it.
For this to be real, for a woman to truly feel free in her life choices and for the fact of being a woman not to make her feel any step below a man (not even in terms of salary), then… It must start at home, because children are the future. And what they see at home is what they will transmit to the society in which they will develop and become adults.
What is co-responsibility in the family and society?
When we talk about equality and the role of women, it is not enough to simply mention work-life balance. It is essential to introduce the concept of family and social co-responsibilityShared responsibility is, simply put, the balanced distribution of household chores and caregiving responsibilities between men and women, so that the lifespans of both are distributed fairly.
This includes much more than just doing laundry occasionally. It involves sharing the work equally. home organization, the raising sons and daughters, the care of dependent persons and also the emotional labor that supports a family. When there is shared responsibility, women's professional careers, health, and well-being are no longer so negatively impacted by the demands of caregiving.
Furthermore, co-responsibility is not limited to the four walls of the home. It represents a profound social transformation. in which public administrations, companies, educational centers and social entities assume their part of responsibility so that men and women can care and work under equal conditions.
Professional development: work and studies
Professional development in our society is becoming increasingly demanding in order to keep up with the times, in social communities that are constantly evolving and growing. Until relatively recently, men had priority access to education and university degrees, which were considered exclusively "for men." Fortunately, that limit has already been overcome and women have the freedom to choose the university degree they want to develop professionally in the field we desire.
However, Formal equality in access to education does not always translate into real equalityCareer choices are still heavily influenced by gender stereotypes, and many women continue to concentrate on care-related professions, which are usually undervalued and underpaid.
But what happens when a woman becomes a mother? Does her time as a student end forever because she has to take care of her children? Not at all. Motherhood should not be the end of educational development.And with the support of the partner and the family or social network, it is possible to find a balance so that both parents enjoy the same training opportunities.
In the case of work, Women continue to face a double burdenTo prove they are just as capable as their male colleagues while simultaneously meeting family expectations that fall primarily on them. It seems that even today, women still have to climb a step in terms of salary and recognition because it's difficult to grasp that a woman is capable of performing the same job as a man with equally or even more satisfactory results.
Work-life balance measures, such as reduced working hours, leave for childcare, or flexible work schedules, are still mostly requested by women. This has direct consequences for their career paths: fewer promotions, lower salaries, greater job insecurity, and more people giving up on personal projects.
That is why it is so important that labor policies, companies, and family culture itself are oriented towards shared responsibility in assuming these permits and measuresWhen a father also reduces his working hours to care for his children, when a man is visibly involved in caregiving at his company, he is contributing to the fact that motherhood is no longer seen as an exclusively female work "problem".
Equal opportunities and gender equity
For decades, women have fought (and will continue to fight) for a equal opportunities they deserveUnfortunately, there are societies with different cultures that are still unable to see this very important step, not only for women, but for society as a whole. Women's active role in society only brings benefits from any angle from which you look at it.
Men and women are different in many ways, but it is also true that We complement each other so that things go betterIt is everyone's responsibility to move our world forward, and this necessarily involves questioning the traditional roles that assign caregiving almost exclusively to women.
Co-responsibility is based on gender equalityThat is, in the fair distribution of resources, time, and responsibilities. This includes free time, physical and emotional energy, income, and also the health risks associated with the double burden that so many women bear.
When caregiving tasks are distributed unequally, traditional gender patterns are perpetuated: They take care, they produceBreaking this pattern requires a profound transformation of beliefs, habits, and expectations. It's not just about men "helping," but about them taking responsibility for their own actions. full and conscious responsibility at home and with the family.
Equal opportunities are also reflected in the educational field, since Children should be able to pursue their vocation without stigma. Nor gender prejudices. Seeing at home that both the father and the mother are involved in all the tasks (from changing a diaper to fixing a plug) breaks down labels such as "this is for girls" or "this is for boys".
Household chores: a real and conscious division
And as I mentioned earlier, a woman, whether employed or not, is not anyone's slave, so Household chores are the responsibility of all members of the same home in order to live together in harmony.
Although every family is different and the way tasks are divided will depend on family circumstances, what is certain and should not be lacking is the equity and equality in household choresIn this sense, both men and women should share household chores according to the time they have available and their actual needs, so that living together is effective and both have an active role.
When we talk about household chores, we're not just referring to cleaning or cooking. We also include... household finance management, planning purchases, home repairs and maintenance, organizing medical appointments, school and extracurricular activities, and all the logistics that make family life work.
Much of this burden is invisible and often falls on women in the form of mental loadThey are the ones who remember dates, anticipate needs, coordinate schedules, and foresee problems. Co-responsibility implies that this planning is also shared, not just the specific execution of certain tasks.
A simple tool to move forward is to sit down as a family, make a detailed list of all household chores (including the small and seemingly insignificant ones) and divide them up. explicitly and consistentlyThe division of responsibilities is reviewed periodically. The goal is not for everything to be rigidly split 50/50, but rather for all adults in the household to feel equally responsible for the smooth running of the home.
Children will see this and it will be a very important example for them and for their inner development. Growing up in a co-responsible home It teaches them that care has no gender and that all people deserve time to rest, learn, work and enjoy.
Childcare and care for other dependents
Just as women were once thought to be in charge of cooking and cleaning the home, it was also believed that women should be solely responsible for raising children and that the father was merely the disciplinarian model that children should follow in order to obey (often out of fear and with a misguided understanding of discipline). This conception emphasized the exclusive responsibility for raising children on the part of the woman.
This is in the past and, nowadays, it is known that children need the active, equal and coordinated participation of both parents so that the upbringing, education, and emotional bond with both is appropriate for their development and emotional well-being. The role of the father in pregnancy, childbirth and raising children is as important as the mother's.
Children need much more than clothes, shelter, and a hot meal. They need to feel that their parents are equally on their side.that both participate in daily tasks (baths, homework, doctor visits, emotional support) and that they can count on either of them to express what they feel.
Shared responsibility also includes the care of other dependent persons within the family, such as caring for elderly, sick, or disabled individuals. Traditionally, these tasks have fallen to daughters, daughters-in-law, and other female relatives, resulting in an enormous and largely unrecognized burden. Distributing this care more equitably, seeking support resources, and demanding adequate public services are key aspects of achieving equality.
Statistics still show that It is mostly women who stop working or reduce their working hours to take care of their children. to children or dependent relatives. This lack of shared responsibility hinders women's employment, widens the wage gap, and causes many women to sacrifice their time, goals, and opportunities.
Educating children from a young age to understand that caregiving is a valuable and shared task is one of the best investments for the future. Seeing their parents divide tasks, talk openly about time, tiredness, and needs, and ask for help when necessary contributes to them growing up with a a more egalitarian and empathetic perspective.
Emotional labor and family well-being
When we talk about co-responsibility, we usually think first about material tasks, but there is an equally important aspect: the emotional laborIt is about all those activities that improve well-being and provide emotional support to others and oneself: listening attentively, giving support, nurturing relationships, handling conflicts, organizing celebrations or special moments, accompanying crying and frustration.
This work is also highly feminized and under-recognizedMany mothers take on the emotional management of the family: they are attentive to how their children are feeling, remember birthdays, maintain contact with extended family, mediate arguments, and try to ensure that "everyone is okay." Although this is essential work for the well-being of the family, it is rarely seen as a responsibility that should be shared.
Co-responsibility implies that Men and women should be trained and involved in emotional care of the family. A father sitting down to listen to his teenage son without judgment, accompanying him through a tantrum, organizing a visit to a sick relative, recognizing his own emotions and sharing them, is also a powerful form of equality.
Working on this aspect involves improving the communication in couples and in familiesPractice active listening, validate each other's feelings, and agree on how to manage daily tensions. Co-responsibility isn't just about each person silently doing their part, but about building together a way of life that cares for everyone in the household.
An attitude based on respect for one's own experiences, self-care, and the search for simple strategies to improve coexistence (such as agreeing on rest times, defining personal spaces, or dividing up who takes care of certain conflicts) helps ensure that no one feels that they are always carrying the emotional weight of the family.
A horizontal relationship model
In this sense, children, from a young age, need to see a horizontal relationship between man and woman so that they grow up knowing that both live with equal opportunities and rights, which is ultimately what a society needs to move forward.
A horizontal relationship does not mean that everything is divided mathematically, but rather that There are no unjust power hierarchies Within the family, important decisions are discussed, opinions are heard, mistakes are acknowledged, and successes are celebrated as a team. In this type of relationship, models of masculinity and femininity are more flexible, and each person can develop their identity more freely.
In those societies where the role of women is still anchored in the past, it is time to move forward and find that turning point where both men and women realize that They are traveling on the same boatCo-responsibility is a fundamental tool to achieve this, because it shows in everyday life that equality is not a threat, but an improvement for all people.
Every gesture counts: a company that adjusts schedules with its entire staff in mindA father taking parental leave, a mother delegating tasks without guilt, a school that educates for equality, an administration that designs public policies based on shared responsibility. All these changes, combined, can significantly shorten the time it would take to close the gender gap if we maintained the current approach. status quo figure.
Moving towards co-responsible homes and societies is neither easy nor quick, because it involves re-examining deeply ingrained beliefs and giving up certain privileges. However, the benefits are enormous: Greater well-being, more real free time for everyone, better health, balanced professional development, and healthier family relationshipsChoosing this model is a concrete, everyday way to build a fairer world for our daughters and sons, and for ourselves as well.