Do you know the sandwich or sandwich technique? It is one of the best methods to put into practice, since it aims to improve communication with our children. In other words, it is a way of being able to say no to something, but in a softer way and making them understand the reasons better. I'm sure you've done it on more than one occasion!
We all need to say what we think of something, without having to keep our opinions to ourselves. But when it comes to the little ones in the house, we must always have the best words to avoid misunderstandings and so that they suffer more than necessary. So, from now on, you will surely put the sandwich technique into practice every day.
How to know how to say 'no'
It is the most important thing in our life. Many times for fear that the other person feels bad, we have let ourselves be carried away by actions that we really did not want to do but if our friend or partner did, we have kept quiet about it. Well, sometimes it happens that way with little ones. Because we want them to be always happy and motivated, of course we can't always do it. Sometimes you have to say a refusal but we will try not to be too abrupt so that they accept it The best way possible. We have to teach them to defend a point of view but without hurting the other person. So, saying no is part of our plans, but with the sandwich technique it will be totally different from what we think.
What is the technique of the sandwich or sandwich
It has that symbolism because it is about saying three ideas summarized in three sentences that will reflect the purpose of a technique like this:
- A positive phrase praising something about the other person And what does it have to do with the topic at hand?
- The negative phrase will go right in the middle to try so it's lighter.
- We end with a new positive phrase which can be making plans for the next time or re-emphasizing something positive about the person.
Now surely you understand why it is called a sandwich or a sandwich. Because it is a technique that consists of three parts. Two more solid as if they were the slices of bread and the central one that is negative but also important to be able to complete the process. It's an idea very valid when the little ones misbehave or we have to cancel a trip or plan that we had planned with them. It will be quite a constructive criticism!
Examples of the sandwich technique
Imagine that your child always has problems when eating, anger, crying and others will be the protagonists when the long-awaited moment arrives. So, first of all we can tell him that we love him very much, that we are delighted to share that lunch time with him but that you need him to eat and calm down, because we do not like to see him like this. Finally we will tell you that we trust you will try by all means and we give you some steps to follow to achieve it.
If you have had a problem at school and you have had a fight with a classmate, it is not a good idea to scold him at first. But he can use this technique and arm you with patience to control you. You will start by saying something similar to the above, that you love him very much that you like when he has fun with his friends and then tell him that when he is fighting with other children he does a lot of damage. Trying to make him see that the damage goes to everyone around him and that it is wrong. We ended up telling him that when he feels that need to fight or get angry, to tell us beforehand and to trust us.
Benefits of the sandwich technique
Perhaps at the beginning it will be somewhat complicated to put it into practice but then everything will go smoothly. Therefore, when we achieve it, we will have a series of benefits to highlight. On the one hand, it is one more step to be able to say no, but in a less altered way. for the little ones it will be a way to raise their self-esteem, since it gives them more value and even helps them make decisions. Since this whole technique is constructive criticism and will not come across as a scolding. Surely this motivates you not to make the same mistakes again!